Make Sense?

I recently overheard someone bemoaning the fact that all too often 'life doesn't make sense'. I concurred in my mind, but my thoughts immediately expanded on the whole idea. Usually when we think of life not making sense, it is due to something negative going on, something in which we simply do not see the good. Whereas, when life is rolling smoothly along (and the way we want it to), it doesn't occur to us whether there is any sense in it: it's good, of course it makes sense! But the more I think about it, especially in the context of our Catholic faith, the more I wonder which scenario really makes more sense.

This temporal life, our faith tells us, is a 'valley of tears'. Isn't it par for that course if we are presented with a degree of suffering that likely doesn't measure up to our desire for an easy life? Isn't that suffering, in fact, a mercy of God? An opportunity to offer to Him penance in this life, and thus, hopefully, lessen our Purgatorial 'time', and that of others, in the next? This makes sense to me. I'm a sinner. Sin requires reparation. Our Lord gives me opportunity to make reparation.

To me, it's God's obvious blessings in our lives that are harder for me to reconcile, because I don't deserve them! I'm thankful for them, but why am I so blessed?! The only answer is God's boundless love for me. My deserving or not deserving His blessings is irrelevant, I think. He loves me, that is all.

To give personal example to all of the above, I relate it to my life with MS. This chronic and progressive condition has been an unwelcome guest in my body for 16+ years now. I believe with all my heart that I have it for a reason (and that it is not simply the luck of the draw). If I didn't believe in God's control, and near presence to me in this, I would be miserable indeed!

What is more amazing to me though, is that He did not ask me to carry this cross alone. Along with the MS, just a few years later, Our Lord allowed me (with the help of St. Elizabeth of Hungary, but that's another post!) to meet the man who would become my husband.

On Good Friday this year we will celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary. And even after all these years, and as my condition progresses along, it never ceases to amaze me how good, how loving, how generous, how absolutely perfect my husband is with and for me. Truly my cross is his cross. And he is teaching our boys to be just like him.

I am blessed beyond measure, and honestly, it doesn't make sense! I don't deserve it! But then, who of us deserves the abundant blessings of Our Lord? It is most humbling.

And so, to come full circle, though there are times I wonder where in the world there is anything good in MS, if I keep my eyes on Our Lord and His eternal purposes, I can see where this negative in my life does make sense. But His blessings on my life--the 'good' things--my husband, my family, these can only, in my mind, be explained through faith in Our loving Lord and His endless mercy on His children. Not because I deserve it, but simply because He loves me.

Make sense?

Ash Wednesday

Meménto, homo, quia pulvis es,
et in púlverem revertéris.

Remember, man, that thou art dust,
and unto dust thou shalt return.

A blessed Ash Wednesday to all as we commence our Lenten journey.

Sunday Morning

This morning we went to the early Mass, and afterward we went to the brunch that was prepared by the Knights of Columbus. It seems of late we have not gone to coffee hour after Mass, but after this morning my husband and I agreed we need to make it a more consistent part of our Sunday morning.

Our boys played with other kids while we we were able to greet Father, say hi and visit a bit with old friends, as well as becoming better acquainted with some new ones, one of whom we have heretofore only known... well... in blogdom! Nice to make all those connections.

Holy Mass, followed by delicious food, good conversation with friends, and kids at play. Now that's the way to spend a Sunday morning.

Kudos....

.... to the designer of my new My Morning Cup header. I think he did a great job, and he did it for free!

Matrimony has its privileges. :)

Rest in Peace....

Today is the funeral of a dear 31-year old mom from our homeschooling community. One week ago she collapsed while homeschooling her kids, and died immediately of what was later found to be coronary artery disease, which she was unaware of having. She leaves behind a husband and four children, ages 7 down to a baby who is not yet one year old. In just over an hour family and friends will say good-bye at a solemn high requiem Mass (where we would be but for sickness).

This is a loss that I can't fathom. I know such tragedies happen, within the will of our loving God, but it is so far beyond my scope of understanding, that I don't have adequate words to apply to it. But I do know that it has given those of us who knew her pause to consider our own mortality, to be thankful for our own families, to realize when our husbands leave for work in the morning that it could be the last time we say good-bye.

For we all share in her destiny, and in the scope of all eternity, none of us has a very long earthly existence. "Whereas you know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is a vapour which appeareth for a little while, and afterwards shall vanish away. " (James 4:14-15) And hopefully, with this heightened sense of the brevity of our own earthly lives, we will renew our resolve to be ever-ready for our own eternal destiny.

And yet for all of the truth and comfort we find in our faith, my heart aches for the family enduring the loss of this young wife, mother, daughter. And so we do all that we know to do: we pray. We pray for this dear soul: Eternal rest grant unto her O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon her, may she rest in peace. We pray for her family, may they find comfort in Mary, Our Blessed Mother, who certainly bore such sorrows, and in Jesus her Son and Our Lord, who alone can give peace, which surpasses our understanding, amidst their present storm.

Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray or us!
Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!

Amen.

The Gift of Your Cross

"The everlasting God has in His wisdom forseen from eternity the cross that He now presents to you as a gift from His all-knowing eyes, understood with His Divine mind, tested with His wise justice, warmed with His loving arms and weighed with His own hands to see that it be not one inch too large and not one ounce too heavy for you. He has blessed it with His Holy Name, annointed it with His Grace, perfumed it with His Consolation, taken one last glance at you and your courage, and then sent it to you from Heaven, a special greeting from God to you, an alms of the all-merciful love of God." - St. Francis de Sales

Shire! Baggins!

I've done it. I've introduced the boys to the inhabitants of Middle-Earth.

In previous posts here I've said that the boys are not ready for the Lord of the Rings trilogy yet, and as much as I'd like to begin reading it to them, there are enough good books out there that they might grow beyond in just a few years, that I saw no need to rush into LOTR; I want to exhaust my book list for the age group they're in now, first.

Well, my youngest has been asking me to read it to them. Added to that, I recently spoke with another homeschooling mom who had read it to her 7 and 9 year olds, and they loved it. So, I decided to give it a go.

We started The Hobbit about a week ago and we are better than halfway through it. They are following it just fine, and enjoying it a lot! If they are still interested when we finish it, we'll go on to Fellowship of the Ring.

It's been seven years since I've read it--I remember my youngest was an infant when I read it last, so I'm enjoying our journey to the Lonely Mountain where Smaug lives, and I look forward to LOTR. And maybe if we get through the trilogy, I might just go on to read The Silmarillion (to myself, not aloud), a book I've had for some time, but have never read.

In any case, it's great fun to have a good excuse to visit Middle-Earth once again, and greater fun to bring the boys with me this time.